Sunday, February 24, 2008

The Letter

So in IB they make you write an essay explaining why you want to be in IB what you expect from it ect... So here it is...They read this and decide whether you can stay...



Writing this essay was much harder than I expected. I would start to write something and get three-hundred words into it and realize that it was terrible and cliched. All I have to do is write about IB, which should be quite simple, I know how to write, my teachers have assigned me much harder things to do, I am passionate about IB, so why is this such a problem? I have a page filled with brain storming, ideas and reasons why I want to be in the IB Programme and what I expect from it. But for the first time in my life I truly have writers block. The words do not seem to string together right and everything sounds terrible. Then it hit me. I am afraid. Afraid that IB will not like what I have to say. Afraid of not being the perfect IB student. I did not want to seem like a fraud when I say that "In IB the only thing you truly need is drive.", because to be quite honest that is something that I had lacked until very recently. When I received my progress report in the mail and saw that I had an F in Chemistry and a D in Algebra. That was the exact moment when I realized how important IB was to me and how lucky I was to be apart of it, and how stupid I was to not realize it. That was the moment when the drive started to kick in and when I felt something starting to shift. When that shift started happening I went to school the following Tuesday and asked [a person whos name i cant mention on my blog] if she could tutor me. I wanted to be in IB, I want to go to a four-year college, I want to be a leader, and I ultimately want to be satisfied with myself and I was definitely am not satisfied with myself.
IB was not something I was forced into. It was my choice and my father, Matt, loves to mention that anytime I get frustrated with it. He was not very fond of the idea of me attending the infamous Franklin in order to go to a program that he saw as no different from the AP courses at Saint Mary’s. He went on and on about how someone would beat me up, how it was not safe, and how overwhelmed I would be. To which I argued that IB and AP were two totally (This was before I had my shining IB vocabulary) different things. I told him that I would rather get beat up a couple of times than to go to Saint Mary’s and be unhappy. The more he learned about IB the harder it was for him to oppose the idea and eventually my mom and I convinced him that IB was my best choice. I was ready for the challenge. I wanted to be in a program where my teachers cared just like my teachers at Commodore. I also did not want to become a typical teenager who is oblivious to the world outside of their high school. Community was important to IB and it was important to me. What I want from IB and why I choose IB are pretty much the same. I want to be a knowledgeable person and I want to not only get accepted to a four year university but also be successful there. I understand that this can only be accomplished by being committed
to the program and willing to work for it.
That progress report was a slap in my face. It made me feel like I was a whole lot of talk but not a lot of results. People tell me that I’m smart and assume that I have straight A’s and that progress report made me want to live up to their expectations and more importantly to my own expectations. I remembered the commitment I made when I entered IB. I wanted to do the best I could and the IB diploma would be proof to myself that I had. My reasoning is that if I can get through IB I will get through college. To me, this didn’t mean straight A’s. It meant doing what my teachers asked of me instead of fighting laziness and making myself struggle.
I consider myself a leader and I try to make my teachers jobs easier by being enthusiastic in class which hopefully in return makes others enthusiastic. I try to make sure that other students do not need a progress report like mine to kick them into gear by telling them not to make IB harder than it needs to be by not doing the work and having to play catch up. There are plenty of resources for IB students and they should take advantage of them. I’m a perfect example of what not to do and how to fix it, hopefully the freshman I talk to will take my advice and understand that you can get through IB if you are motivated and you want it. I’m more motivated than ever now and I am willing to go get it.

3 comments:

Mandy said...

I came across your blog from your mom's. After reading your essay it is amazing to see how much you have grown in just two weeks. I think IB sounds wonderful and very challenging, but you also seem up to it. Your parents must be very proud of you, as you should be proud of yourself!

And as a young woman that did not follow her dreams of going to a four year college because of fear, I promise you in the long run you will be grateful to have found the "drive".

Best wishes to you.

ib said...

I appreciate that very much thank you.

jack's utter lack of surprise said...

hell. i'm not your parent, i don't even know you. but reading that made me proud of you.